Remember it is your wedding. That doesn’t mean be mean or rude…that means you only get to do this ONE time. Let yourself be the princess! But include those close to you (i.e. mom and sisters in my case)
Pick your battles (as Marty says). What is important to you? For me, the dress and photographer. Therefore we went all out on that and got by with other things. What will people remember 20 yrs down the road about your wedding? NOTHING. You will only have the pictures! HInt: Get a good photographer who wants YOU to be happy and truly knows it is your wedding.
Look for ways to cut corners (not a bad thing). We wanted yellow as our wedding color. We went to the reception site and to get yellow napkins or tablecloths it was extra. Black and white were included in the rental fee. So we accented with black and white. Which meant we had black and white napkins and white tablecloths. It was still beautiful. Since you cut this price…you now have more to put towards what means the most to you…to me it was a photographer.
Guest list…BIG issues. in the end you are the one who mails the invites (HEEHEE). So make a seating chart for your guests. This way everyone who was invited has a seat..not invited, no seat.
Have someone or even you buy your mom and (probably) your mother in law a book on their role in the wedding. it will keep them in check if they have trouble allowing you to do what you want.
Include your groom in everything. No that doesn’t mean he has to come to every apt but it will make you both happier. You can say WE DID THIS TOGETHER.
Have a checklist of what you should be doing month to month. You can google it. It will help you more than you know. It may sound crazy but it was better than some hired wedding planner I didn’t know.
Do not let anyone tell you it isn’t about you because it is. But don’t be mean….my wedding day was the most fun I EVER had.
Consider your options…if you get married at 6 pm outdoors like me…get your photos before the wedding. No, you will not be doomed for eternity. Trust me. My makeup was the best before the wedding (I cried during the ceremony) and it was hot. Our photos were beautiful because we spend a few hours doing what we wanted and taking photos where we wanted because there was no one waiting to eat. Best decision we made.
Ask about discounts. I got my dress with a discount because it was my first time looking for a dress there.
Cash bar…we had to pay waiters an hourly fee to serve soft drinks. If we had a cash bar and our guests bought a certain amount hourly on average our hourly fee was reduced since the waiters served coke and liquor. Nice to know.
If I could do anything over again…I wouldn’t. I had FUN and loved EVERY minute I spent with my new husband. I wasn’t stressed. If it wasn’t done before that day it obviously wasn’t that important and no way to do it now. And believe me the last thing you will be thinking about it the flowers, the cake and what your mother in law wore when you told her not to wear that.
Have fun and smile. Your photos will be there FOREVER. Be calm and don’t let anyone tell you different. It is truly YOUR day.
Jennifer Martin
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